as a friend, im very low maintenance. you dont need to text me every day. no need to see me everyday. once in a while remembering will do. and i assure you, i'll be forever loyal. ndi ko lang naiintindihan kung bakit simpleng bagay ndi pa naiintindihan. bakit kelangan ako i-push to my limit and hurt me. i admit im not perfect. masungit ako. pride to the high. its my way of coping. its me. its nice to be with friends. but now, im not enjoying. people may see it as a shallow-arte move. but its me. ganon talaga ako. i dont want my life to be planned. it bores me. (i think) im wild in my own normal way that it if exceeds my limit. i panic and break down. i have been crying over this for some time now. baka nga it really is something to me. sana lang hindi ganto kasi masakit na. baka nga talagang walang problema. baka its just me. thank you blog for being my constant sponge. i dont share things as often as i would with tsismis. sana nga ganun nalang. baka it would help me. but then again, its just me.
i don't know whats up with me. i have been swarming up on people until they hate me. as in really hate me? why do i do it? i dont know. grabe talaga. ndi koooo alaaaaaam. for the people i made this wrong move. im sorry. i assure you. i'll try my best not to do it again. i'll try to get lost.
on returning, saying goodbye, or just being myself.
for the nth time. i had to reclaim by blog. ahahahaa. i was kinda surprised nga that blogspot was still on. i missed typing long shits. ahahahaa. i'll do the remembering of the past 2 years next time. eto ako ngayon. nanunuod ng tv. yes its about cory. i read the newspaper i while ago.. yes its about cory too. A writer said, that to people born after EDSA I, Cory was a former president, 1st female president in Asia, Kris' mother and a woman always in yellow. i cant help but cry whenever its about her. i dont know if its because of her or im just really a cry baby. but while i was reading. i suddenly stopped. i didn't finish reading. its not that im not interested. i think everything is just too much. it has STOP. at least for myself, it needs to stop. i still continued watching tv but its not about cory.
**"you should look out for yourself. coz if you don't, no one else will."
it's been two weeks na ata since i last posted. nakakatawa. nakalimutan ko nanaman yung username and password. guess im getting old. hahaha!!! so much happened to me these past 2 weeks. i was planning to write everything here. but you see.. wala. kasi tinamad ako :p what's new. and i forgot some of them already.
naalala ko lang last week is that i saw old people dancing. and they danced as if no one was watching. they were quite old and didn't really move that good. but that sight, for me, was amusing. tae. amusing? that made it seem funny. ndi ko kasi ma-explain. i tried telling that story to my classmates. and just as i thought. they laughed. anong nakakatawa dun? naisip ko tuloy. what's cool in not dancing? do we not dance coz we think its corny? or do we not coz we don't know how and wouldn't want anyone to know and laugh at us. while i was watching, gumigilid na luha sa mata ko. i was just sitting there watching them bust their moves. i wish i could give them my youth. ma-enjoy man lang nila yung pagsasayaw nila. but come to think of it. they had their time. pero tayo mahaba pa. its up to us how we spent it. ndi siguro maganda na 3/4 ng buhay ko nakaupo ako at nagyoyosi.
Sa nayon ko (tama ba?)
-created by Bj
Sa nayon ko, puro lalaki. madaming prostitute. sa murang halaga na 500, pde na. mapag-iipunan ng tricycle driver o kung sino man. ang paborito nila sa babae.. yung crispy fried. una, itatali muna sa puno yung babae. syyempre nakabuka yung legs. sa ilalalim. magsisimula ng apoy. tapos lalagyan ng kahit anong cooking oil yung (i can't say it. medical term nalang. sorry if you can't understand) pudendum. tapos yun na. magiging crispy fried na. kukurot yung lalaki sa balat. may onting dugo pa. yan ang mga tao sa nayon ko.
**sorry mejo kadiri yung kwento. nadiri rin naman ako. but it's just a short story. ( i hope) yung gumawa niyan, malapit nang sumulat ng komiks sa mga bareta. yehey. penge pera.
nakakatawa! it's been almost a year since i last blogged. ndi ko na natandaan yung username and password ko. hahaha! i even had to re-claim this blog. fannieh. who cares. akin naman to. i can still remember the first time i blogged and why i did it. nainggit na ata ako sa mga binabasa ko. they have been very impressive in maintaining and preserving theirs.. eh yung akin, inamag na. hahahah. but for the same reason i had a year ago, i still don't know what i write about. i just feel like writing. the whole year (not starting from january) is quite a good year.. i met and forgot a lot of people. i guess everything is changed. i've been enjoying essays these past few months. ndi kasi ako makabasa ng novels. tae sa haba. ndi ko nga mabasa academic books ko. leisure books pa kaya? eh yung essays,they're quite short. enough to be read in one sitting without making a hole in your chair. ang sarap nun enjoy kahit sandali. quickie in a malicious language. hahahahah! catch uppp later! :) i miss you blog <3>
there are a lot of stuffs troubling me now. im feeling too sentimental and emotional. effect ata ng one tree hill. people's lives changing, feeling alone and being alone. sakto. bigla ko tuloy namiss lahat. lahat, kasi i dont even know what im missing. i just miss. i really dont have anything to do, so nanunuod lang ako ng tv hanggang bumagsak mata ko. after manuod, reflect? yun ata tawag dun. you try relating stories with your life. kung may match at same thing happened in the end, BINGO. kung hindi, masakit aminin pero, it sucks big time. its as if you're living your life the wrong way. alam kong hindi dapat sineryoso. palabas nga eh. show = not real. but most of the time... its real. siguro dahil tao rin yung gumawa nun. wala lang. lately, im feeling off about everything. eto na siguro yung stress na tinatawag. kaya lang, its kinda ironic na stress fills my life on a sembreak. as in nothing to study. ang labo. kung ndi ka nanunuod ng tv, ndi boring buhay mo. kaya ka nanunuod kasi you have a boring life and needs to be entertained. if you're not getting this, okey lang. maybe its not you. maybe its me.
one thing about me having crushes, minsan lang sa isang century. i guess i watch too much tv. kaya nagkakaroon ng concept ng dream boy. yung tipong kakadream ko, dream na nga lang talaga. ayoko nung may kakilala sa circle of friends. meron nga, pero no one is really that dream-boy type. you try to do your best to impress. though he may not see it, you know its a step to him. you try to do something you really had no idea, step rin to him. then malalaman mo na may nililigawan(?) siya na kilala mo. how fucked up is that. lahat ng ginawa and thinking to do nawala. like a piece of glass shattered into pieces. ndi na mabubuo ulit. ithink im okey, pero ndi ko alam, prang ndi. i guess i have to wait for another century.
--"my ex-husband is still a prince charming, just not mine..." -miriam quiambao
